My entire life I've never been good with my words. My thoughts get jumbled and I can never find the right way to say things. Even when I know exactly what I want to say, the second I open my mouth... it's like I have dyslexia of the words.
Me: On one condigency.
Matt: Do you mean, "On one condition?"
Me: ....Yes.
Matt: *Laughing*
Matt: *Places big plate of bacon on my lap*
Me: *Takes a bite then moans* Oh Grandpa!
Matt: *Confused*
Me: *Confused* Did I just say, "Oh Grandpa??"
Matt: *Laughing* Yes!
-While watching Vegas Vacation-
Me: Who is that?
Matt: It's...oh, what's his name...it's...
Me: ...Twayne Newton!!!
Matt: *Laughing*
Me: What? It's him! Right?
Matt: Twayne Newton??? *Laughing* His name is Wayne Newton.
-Sitting at the dinner table with my family-
Me: Don't eat with your shoulders on the table.
My family: *Laughing*
Me: *Confused* What? Don't laugh at me!
My brother: Don't eat with your elbows on the table.
Me: ....Oooooh.
-Eating dinner with my family-
Me: Don't chew with your mouth full.
My Family: *Confused*
My brother: Are we suppose to chew with it empty?
Family: *Laughing*
Me: ....
Brother: Do you mean, "Don't chew with your mouth open?"
Me: ...Yes.
Me: He's the head poncho!
Matt: *Laughing* Head PONCHO?!
Me: Yeah...the head poncho.
Matt: *laughing harder* It's head honcho.
Me: I use to love Caprasun.
Matt: It's CapRIsun.
Me: Noo. That sounds weird.
Matt: *Laughing* It's CapriSun. Like Capri pants.
Me: No, it's not. It's Caprasun.
My brother: *Laughing* Glenna it's CapriSun.
Me: ....You're trying to trick me.
Matt & my brother: *Laughing*
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