Monday, September 2, 2013

hello again

It's September. The summer is coming to an end (not fast enough, might I add...) School has started. We're moved and settled. I'm thrilled because we've never gotten everything on the walls as fast as this last time around. It already feels more like home than East Beach ever did. We don't miss it.
Not one bit.
I'm taking human anatomy along with a few other classes. I'm both excited and nervous. The monster inside of me demands I sacrifice everything in my path in order to maintain my grades. I call it a monster because even if it means my own demise, I can't conquer this beast side of me. This doesn't mean I wont give up without a fight, though. Here's to staying sane :)

On a side note, whether the weather wants to comply or not, this girl is pulling out all the spiced/fall/leaves candles and garlands and is ready to welcome the most wonderful time of the year!

Friday, May 24, 2013

pictures I don't put on instagram but are equally awesome

a.) My best friends little sister got married last weekend, aka, basically my little sister. It was so much fun getting together and celebrating such a monumental step in her life. Also, I can't remember the last I was there with her whole family together. They were like my 2nd family from middle school all the way through high school. When her Dad said he liked Matt and thought he was, "a really cool guy." I almost died. Not because I was surprised, because come on, Matt is a seriously awesome dude, but because from boyfriend #1 none of them were good enough for me! 
b.) I've finally gotten on top of putting all our random little trinkets put together in one place. At first I thought I'd hate having things so disorganized but I seriously am obsessed! I love being able to open up to any random page and be reminded of a whole variety of memories.
c.) Going to lunch with my baby bu.
d.) Right after the dermatologist burned off my pre-cancer spot on my nose. It hurt. It's officially begun to turn brown/black...
e.) After my best friend's little sister's wedding Matt surprised me with a spontaneous trip to Disneyland! It was our first time going with just the 2 of us and it was definitely special. Not to mention there were like, no lines. I think we got through the Indiana Jones ride in 15 min or less. It was nuts!
f.) Matt realized most of our pictures were kissing ones. Oops! :) Hashtag, sorry not sorry! 
g.) Matt has bought me about 10 different set of roses this month. And I don't want to sound spoiled or anything but I'm definitely getting used to having beautiful, fresh, candy-scented flowers all over the house. 
h.) Sawyer begging for his doggy crack aka those greenie denty sticks. Seriously. Those things are made of crack!
i.) That's just Husband looking sharp as usual. 
j.) More delicious roses.
k.) Random pictures I find on my phone that Matt took of his precious proteins. That man loves his bacon. Hahaha. 
l.) Sawyer being all like, "Yo!" & "I lub you."

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

the office makes you cry

Have you seen the season finale of The Office? If you haven't don't read this...there are spoilers.

I had my last final today. It was for sociology. And to say I'm relieved it's over is a huge understatement. I had an A in the class so I might have gotten to a point where I stopped studying as much as I usually do and did other stuff instead.

After that I went to the dermatologist to get some moles looked at. On our way there Matt was telling me how much work he had to do and I told him if he needed to stay home and work that was okay! I could go by myself. But he is so supportive and sweet and knew I was a little nervous and came with me anyway. So I sat there in my little paper gown, stripped from all my clothing except my garment bottoms (which I rolled up into the silliest looking granny panties you've ever seen) and we waited. When the doctor came in it was mostly "let me check your scalp, show me your arms, let's look between your toes" so Matt pulled out his phone to do what work he could. Now, if you've been to one of these visits you know there's a point where they check more than just your scalp, arms and toes. They check you EVERYWHERE. It was at this point that Matt randomly decided to zone back in and looked up to see me flashing the doctor and the nurse. Matts expression was so funny, I couldn't help but blush, and when we got in the car he told me why, "Usually when I see you like that, it's just me!" Haha. Even though it was a bit awkward having the doctor, "Yes, we look 'down there' too." I'm glad I went in because I ended up having a pre-cancerous spot on my nose. Fortunately he was able to freeze/burn it and wa-la! No more precancerous spot! I now only have a big red nose that he warned me would get more red and more puffy...but only before it turns black and falls off. Good thing I don't have anything major this week.

Anyway, all of this brings us to The Office because we'd been waiting to watch it for a good night. A night that I didn't have homework or was studying, that Matt wasn't working like crazy, a night that didn't have activity days, or we were babysitting, or any of the other number of things that consume our lives. And we decided the last day of my finals would be perfect! So we made an early dinner and started The Office. 
There's this scene towards the middle, it's at Dwight's wedding and Jim is the best man. You actually see that after 9 years of working together, they've come to understand, appreciate and even care for each other. But Jim tells Dwight he can't be his best man anymore because according to the Schrute rules the best man has to be older than the groom. It's at this point that the camera turns around and 
lo-and-behold, guess who is standing there? MICHAEL SCOTT! Matt and I both literally broke down and started crying. 
This random TV show has been there through so many phases of my life. It was there during crushes, and break ups, during my own office experiences, during family drama, friend drama, good times and bad times. I feel like I've grown along with the characters. And when Michael left the show I missed him so much. That may be weird, but I did. I missed him as much as I would have missed any real person I had a friendship with in life. And I think after all those years of him being gone from the show, and missing him, and watching the old seasons of The Office and remembering what it use to be, and then all the sudden...there he was!

My brother passed away almost 3 years ago. There isn't a day that I don't still think about it. Some days I just think, and some days I cry and hurt like it just happened. My grandparents are both getting old and were recently in the hospital. I talked to them yesterday and they both told me, "How does 10 more years sound?" And I broke down crying. Because I'm selfish. I know they're ready. They've lived a full life and done all of the things they wanted to do. They're even excited to see all of their loved ones that have left them. But I am selfish. And I want them to stay with me. I don't want another person to miss. I guess, life is just full of missing people though. And seeing Michael Scott, probably one of my favorite humans of all time (never mind that he's fictional) after missing him for what felt like so long... I think it will be only a fraction of the kind of joy and relief I'll feel when I get to see my little brother again. When I'll get to see all of the people I've had to say goodbye to and miss so much.

The Office was suppose to be a funny sit-com and they've completely turned it into something so much more. 

"I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them."
-Andy Bernard

Which is why I'm so grateful for this life that I have. How true that statement is. The troubles you think plague your life today, will be your most fond memories tomorrow. It just makes me want to record everything about this life so I don't forget or take one second, or person for granted.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

bang bang

The Great Gatsby was wonderful for so many reasons.

Such a beautiful and tragic story. I definitely recognized a lot more symbolism and meaning than the 6th grade Glenna that read the book oh-so-long-ago. Can I say I relate to Jay? In the fact that sometimes I feel my one down fall will be that I want too much, I ask for too much, I expect too much.

I don't think I could do it justice putting it into words. But in light of it being Finals week, and my brain being full of mush from studying, I thought I'd take a little break and enjoy the greatness that this is.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

not goodbye

"Nothing you love is lost. Not really. Things, people - they always go away, sooner or later. You can't hold them, any more that you can hold moonlight. But if they've touched you, if they're inside of you, then they're still yours. The only things you ever really have are the ones you hold inside your heart."